Just Thinkin' Out Loud

Written two hours after the midnight end of Memorial Day:

Today is a good night to be drunk. As the sun dips below the horizon to lay amongst its heavenly harem the wind picks up. The breeze is relaxed. Strong enough to tickle the trees, making them sway with their subtle chuckles, but light enough to cool your freshly perspired brow of the otherwordly heat brought on by this deliciously delicious liquid fire.

My parents gave me a Macbook out of the blue. I don't know if it was because I'm a good son or because I'm spoiled, but I smile just the same typing on it like I am now. The alcohol makes the worlds of words flow easier. Like a breakdancer trying to seduce a ladyfriend with moves as fluid as the waters of Lake Michigan my mind fires soft synaptical seduction to make my fingers do precisely what it desires.

It's on nights like these that I feel my loneliness hardest. Enjoyment is meant to be shared and I'm having the time of my life. Writing on my porch gives me a piece of mind unlike anything else. The only thing better would be sharing it with someone. A lovely lass, fine as the sands of Hawaii and as lovely as the Rockies during a cloudless sunrise.

It's what we're all meant for really. Love. True love. It's an easy concept to imagine but near impossible to bring about. Someone who loves you for you and wants to help you be better. An ideal that we write songs, books, and movies about to no end should be as easily accessible as a pack of smokes or a greasyass hamburger. But it's not. Makes no sense to me. Do you understand?

Anyway, if you're gonna have a buzz alone make it a strong one. That way your senses aren't acute enough to focus on the lackings. The gaping holes in your heart . The empty hands desirous of the soft, giving flesh of another. Mouth closed, engaging no other minds or lips but those of the cold, dispassionate rocks glass.

Eeeeeyup. Nights like these are made for me. Forgetting my loneliness I can focus on the kid down the street in Spiderman pajamis, still up at this hour, and the parents who ain't watchin' him. The cat lady coughed inside her house. Amongst the several dozen cats she is either caring for or holding captive in her backyard I'm shocked I actually heard it. The car across the street is unfamiliar to me, but the one next to my house isn't. It belongs to the boyfriend of the large-breasted be-spectacled neighbor who is so keen to care for a cat that clearly despises her.

Nights like these are like meditation. A reboot for the mind where one can just sit down and let nature restore all the default settings anew, refreshed, ready for another round of corporate drudgery and minutiae minding. So, for right now, while I have the moment I'll take a deeeeeep breath.

*DEEEEP BREATH*

Aaahhh. So much better. Gimme the invisible touch of nature's hand any day. It's been a longass week and a hardass weekend. Thank God for tonight. Thank God for the breeze. Thank God for this computer. And thank God for the alcohol. I am blessed beyond imagining. Hallelujah. *Amen*